Below is a short article I submitted about celebrity gossip. It had to be 200-300 words and I assumed, preferably snarky. Unfortunately, I failed to win a spot to help blog about the Toronto Int'l. Film Festival. I had to go to lainey's site to see who has beaten my editorial to submission. Naturally, I think that he will do a fantastic job. But just for grins and giggles, here is what I wrote:
Hubby has left me to see our new nephew out of town this weekend. What was a girl to do? I rented the DVD of the sleeper no-hit "Australia" by Baz Luhrman, his name proudly emblazoned on the disc.
I am not a movie expert but I found this film tolerable eventhough it was quite long. I cannot count how many times I thought it was over only to be hit by "But wait! There's more!" moments.
Nicole Kidman was very interesting. I was riveted by how much effort it took her to convey any kind of emotion. Girl seriously needs to lay off the Botox. Maybe she should ask husband to perform his contractual obligation and get her pregnant again so she will stop using it. At one point in the movie, there was a forgettable scene where I could've sworn it looked like they drew three vertical lines on her smooth forehead to make it seem like she was troubled. Her lips were scene stealers too- plump and juicy and red. But the third lip reared it's ugly head every time she tried to smile. All these almost distracted me from leching after Hugh Jackman. Almost.
Hugh is an amazing actor considering he had to be falling in love with Miss Plastic Face. He had love in his eyes when, in the back of his mind, he's probably thinking, "Would those lips feel like smooth rubber balls?" He singlehandedly made this movie bearable for me. Everything about him makes my lady bits happy. His voice, his accent, his eyes, his lips and oh, that body. If I concentrate hard enough, I could imagine him loving me instead of Nicole. Needless to say, if I had a Freebie Five, he would be in it.